This week, I have brought an excerpt from Jeff Cavins’ reflection of Friday, November 22, 2024, that struck me incredibly. The wisdom therein has validated some of my thoughts and made me resolve to do a few things differently. I hope you find it as impactful as I have.

 

According to research and accounts from hospice nurses, there are five common regrets of most people who are dying. If they could go back and, in a way, cleanse it, what would they do differently? Writer Bronnie Ware wrote a book called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing. Bonnie’s patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.”

 

1. “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” Many people regret that they didn’t follow their passion, some would say, the desire that God put in their heart. Rather than following God, they pursued what others thought they should do.

 

2. “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.” This speaks of a work-life balance. She said, “This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.” 


 

3. “I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.” Bronnie discovered that the elderly regretted not expressing themselves openly, positive or negative. She said, “Many people suppressed their feelings to keep peace with others. Many developed illnesses relating to their bitterness and resentment as a result.”

 

4. “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.” She said, “Often, they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks, and tracking them down was not always possible.

5. “I wish that I had let myself be happier.” – Happiness is, after all a choice is the summary of this

 

Maybe today, we can learn a bit from the elderly and do some reverse engineering. That is, we can start at the end and listen to wisdom, then return to the present and clean the house of our hearts, minds, and bodies. Sometimes cleaning the house is not just a matter of physically getting the garbage out, but sometimes cleansing the house is a matter of attitude!