After 9 years of relationship, Mike decided to marry his lover-girl, “Rose” as he used to call her. He told his friends he had not seen such a humble and gentle girl in his life. She accepts anything from him without fighting back. The girl also assured her parents and siblings that her guy deserved her partnership as he had all it takes to finance her needs. But Rose decided to hide the fact that Mike was a rude drunkard.

    Couples who accept God as their potter while they are the clay believe they did not choose the sex they belong but God did: He made Adam the man and Eve, the woman. So, Adam should not see himself as god and Eve a thing. But Mike’s father was the provider while his mother was the consumer and Mike wanted his story to be same as that of his father. So, on their wedding day, she got to know that Mike was ready to keep her as a slave girl. Spouses are life partners and not slave and master.

      Yet, Rose was so happy that she danced with all her strength because she is now married after all her younger siblings have become parents while she was still roaming the streets as a single girl has come to an end. Later, she will get to know that it is better to be alone than to be with the wrong person.

     When the first part of the wedding program came to an end, the Bride was expected to change her wedding gown and come for the final part: speeches, entertainment, etc. Mike with his Best-man and Rose with her Bride’s Maid went in quickly. As Rose was changing her dress, Mike warned her not to dance again. As she looked at him, he slapped her. That took away the beautiful smile which made everyone at the wedding to admire her during the first part.

     Rose thought the best time to stop unnecessary argument is to stop before it starts. So, she kept quiet! In Kano, on 25th February 2019 at 8pm, a woman was angry with her husband, when she suspected that he was having a phone conversation with his girlfriend. When she attempted to snatch the phone from him, she mistakenly pushed him from the stairs and he fell and died.

      Slowly, Rose wanted to say something and Mike slapped her again and shouted saying, “I’m your husband. I have paid the bride price; you are the slave and I the master; hence you must obey me till you die!” Then her smile was replaced with frown that lasted till the end of that day. When they came to the floor, every Dick and Harry became conscious of her sadness and that changed their joy into mourning as if death has occurred. The crowd stopped photographers from taking pictures and gradually, the music stopped as many people (including their friends) started living for home.

     Rose parents and other relations were being consoled by their friends as they slowly left the scene for home. Barely two weeks later, Mike dealt with Rose violently again to the knowledge of her parents and siblings. As they could no longer accommodate the pains, they jointly asked Rose to return home alive before the unexpected will happen.

     If you make yourself the horse rider and your partner the horse, before long you will realize that the horse has the right to decide who rides on him or her. The dog says, “You fall for me and I fall for you that is how friendship should be. But if you make me fall always without you falling for me, I will fall out with you!” Learn to say, “I’m sorry” when you are wrong. Be a model to those around you. People are watching you: so, why not leave a legacy for them. It shall be well with you and your family.

     It is not possible to marry a perfect person but you can help your partner to work towards perfection as you journey together in your marriage life. Let the weak admit that he or she is weak and let the strong zealously help the weak for the good of your union. If you cannot win, make the one ahead of you break the record.” Jan M.

     What are you passing through in your marriage life that is likely to carry you away? Tell it to Jesus who died to save you, he cares for you. “Do not let your passions carry you away; this can tear your soul to pieces like a bull. You will be left like a dead tree without any leaves or fruit” Sirach 6:2-3.

     Your partner should be your closest friend apart from God: give him or her benefit of doubt when a cloudy situation occurs. Do not allow pride, ignorance, perishable things of this world, etc. to ruin the sweet relationship you built over the years. Be in the habit of forgiving your spouse ever before he or she offends you! In marriage, there is need for one to be conscious of his/her partner’s feelings and needs. Husband and wife need the wisdom of Blessed Mother Mary and St Joseph to enable them to succeed in marriage.

     My dear readers, there is need to pray on daily basis to God to protect and preserve your marriage. Look unto God for He is ready to see you through. I have not seen any marriage without hiccups but when husband and wife work together, they forge ahead easily.

   Though nobody is perfect except God, when you marry the bone of your bones, you will experience love, peace and joy in your marriage. So, before you marry, go to God who has the plans of your life in His hand. He will open your eyes and ears to see and hear Him as He directs you to the bone of your bones. Mt. 7:7-8 says, “Ask and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock and it will be opened to you. For, everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened”.