Lilly Path with Ifeoma Odisa UGWU

Dear Sister,

Let’s talk about something many of us will face more than once in life: Being hurt by someone who never apologises.

Maybe it was a friend who stopped speaking to you without explanation.
Maybe it was a parent who wounded you with words or silence.
Maybe it was someone you trusted who let you down, but when you finally found the courage to say, “You hurt me,” they acted like it was no big deal, or worse, blamed you for feeling hurt at all.

What do you do when the people who broke you down, don’t own it up?

How do you move forward without the words “I’m sorry” to comfort or validate your pain?

This is where true healing begins, not in their apology, but in your decision to let God heal your heart anyway.

You May Never Hear “I’m Sorry”

Some people won’t apologise because they don’t realize what they did. Others won’t because pride won’t let them. Some don’t even remember the details of what hurt you—but you do. You’ve replayed it over and over, waiting for closure that hasn’t come.

If you’re not careful, this waiting will become a weight, anchoring you in resentment, bitterness, and silent anger. And while they move on, you stay stuck.

Here’s the truth: You don’t need their apology to be healed. You need God’s presence, God’s truth, and your own choice to forgive.

Forgiveness Is Not Weakness

Forgiveness doesn’t mean pretending it didn’t hurt. It doesn’t mean excusing what they did. It doesn’t mean you have to let them back into your life.

Forgiveness is you saying:

“I choose to stop carrying this pain because my heart is too valuable to live in bondage.”

Forgiveness is strength. It is healing. It is release.

It is choosing to let God handle what you can’t fix.

Colossians 3:13 says, “Bear with each other and forgive one another... Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

You’ve been forgiven for much. Now, you get to walk in that same freedom by offering it, even when it’s not requested.

 

What Forgiveness is NOT:

It’s not denial.

It’s not letting people walk all over you.

It’s not skipping over boundaries.

It’s not instant trust.

Forgiveness is a heart posture, not a free pass.

You can forgive and still walk away. You can forgive and still keep your distance. You can forgive while still grieving what was lost.

But you forgive because your peace matters more than their pride.

 

Let God Be Your Closure

Waiting on people to acknowledge their wrongs may leave you empty. But taking your pain to God makes space for true comfort.

He sees what they don’t say.

He hears what they never admit.

He understands what they brush off.

Psalm 34:18 tells us, “The Lord is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

God is not dismissive like people can be. He sits with you. He heals what no human words could ever repair. He fills the gaps.

 

Reflection Questions for the Week

Is there someone I’m still waiting to hear “sorry” from?

How has holding on to the offence affected my peace?

What would it look like to release this pain to God today?

 

Pray with Me

Dear God,

I’ve been hurt, and sometimes I wait for an apology that may never come. Help me to release this pain to You. Help me to forgive, not because they deserve it, but because You have forgiven me so deeply. Teach me to protect my heart without becoming bitter. Heal the broken parts, and make me whole again. Amen.

With love and gentle strength,

Your Big Sister in Christ