Every year the world celebrates St. Valentine’s day, a day named after a Catholic priest that epitomizes love. But by aligning to the ungodly nature of the world, rather than to its Christian roots, Valentine’s day has become tantamount to anything and everything that true love abhors. While giving is an integral part of Valentine’s day celebration, but the initial giving was not sought after, it was not begged for. It was freely given. Today, the act of giving at Valentine has become so forced that it is not appropriate to call it an act of giving gift. In many instances, the recipients are the ones demanding what they want and if the supposed lover could not give what they want, the gift is often rejected, or not appreciated. This is not what Valentine is about.

Valentine is a celebration of authenticity, a celebration of authentic love, not forced love. It is a celebration of true love and true love is about love that is freely given. It is a love that is unconditional. It is not based on the beauty of the other or because of what one hopes to get from the partner. It is given because the love that we feel towards the other impels us to do the good for the sake of the other. This act, it is quite clear, those in the world do not know nor understand. Their interpretation of giving, whether at Valentine or at other time is that “You are not giving me because you do not love me.” Yet, true love is about the nature of our being with the other much more than what we give the other. It is about how we value the other. Those who dictate gifts probably do not deserve it or the relationship has not grown to the level that the other is moved to give freely.

Yes, sometimes, you can suggest what you want, but the other would have also indicated that he is ready to give… and give what will be useful to the recipient. Much giving today is tantamount to blackmail and therefore, lacking in value. Other acts of giving are such that the recipient becomes enslaved to our giving and such dependency is foreign to the spirit of love. True love is a sacrificing love, always ready to go the extra mile. This is the kind of love we have also received from Christ our Saviour, who died for us even while we were still sinners.

At Valentine, we should go out to put smile on people’s faces, by feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, counseling the confused and doubtful. In this Jubilee Year, our acts of love will also engender hope of a better life for many people. There are many poor people around us who need our acts of love, there are also the aged, the lonely, the unloved, the marginalized. Valentine is also for them to experience God’s love. Valentine is not only about spousal love, but more about sacrificial love and we are not seeing enough of this.

Valentine’s day may have gone this year. But every day is for the lover and true love is not limited to a day. As Christians, we are called to show love always, not just on a special day. With the way the world is today, it is even in people’s poor condition or in their poor estate that many people need our help and Christians must rise up to these occasions and lift people up through acts of genuine and sacrificial love. All of us must be outgoing, focusing more on what we can do for others rather than what we want them to do for us. After all, we have been taught that it is better to give than to receive. The red colour associated with Valentine is not arbitrary, it is a reminder of the kind of love associated with Valentine, a sacrificial love, a love that suffers with, not one that exploits or empties the giver of his goods. The colour of love is red, the colour of blood shed for the sake of the other. All lovers must be willing and ready to give until it hurts, to sacrifice all for the sake of love, to give one’s life for the sake of the other. Indeed, “No greater love can a man have than to lay down his life for his friends.” No doubt Valentine’s day celebration has been hijacked by the secular, money greedy, capitalist, hedonistic world, but the world must not be allowed to have the final say. We need to reclaim the truth of enduring and sacrificial love that humanity needs and also teach the world that is hell-bent on collapse. Human beings are made for love, but not selfish or materialistic love, but the kind of love that transforms us and sets us free to live above material needs and nurture the emotional capital of people so as to make the world a better place.

In the final analysis, celebrating Valentine’s Day is more than giving gifts and professing love in a poetic manner. Love is for always and if love is limited only to Valentine, then it is not love but commerce. Let us allow love to colour our hearts and we shall make our beloved, better people, happy people, and the love we share will transform our world.